Remember Tony Alamo

I cannot remember a time before Tony Alamo. This gentleman is a self-proclaimed "World Pastor" who preaches a brand of Evangelical Christianity that I don't pretend to fully understand. However, his big compound a few miles from my childhood home made him always in the periphery of my consciousness. There were all sorts of allegations about polygamy and child molestation that circulated. I have no idea if those allegations are true. In recent years, I recall, Alamo was arrested and tried for child molestation and perhaps child pornography. The feds got involved. My hometown was a circus.

I say all of that to say that it is nearly impossible for me to complete this assignment without realizing that I have some really, really deep biases against people I snap-judge as crackpots. Tony Alamo would be one of those people.

Last week, a friend received a Tony Alamo Christian Ministries World Newsletter on the windshield of his car while parked at a local Wal-Mart in the town where I live now. The compound and the child brides and the circus are well out of sight, but they linger in my mind. So I took a look at the pamphlet. I tried. I really did.

I read through the main article, "Eternal Life" by Alamo himself. It lays out what I would consider a fairly traditional Evangelical plan of salvation by placing one's faith in Christ and receiving forgiveness for sin by grace.

The idea, in case you did not grow up in a similar tradition, is that Jesus Christ is the one and only incarnation of God, the YHWH, or LORD of the Old Testament. Jesus was miraculously conceived by the virgin Mary through a work of the Holy Spirit (the other part of the Trinity, though we're not going there today), and then Jesus lived a sinless life. He was betrayed by one of his apostles, Judas, and he was crucified unjustly. In the process, though, Jesus took on the sins of the entire human race. He went through hell and then was resurrected three days later. Then, after a month on earth, he ascended into heaven. This process of sinless death, burial, and resurrection, makes him a perfect sacrificial substitute for the atonement for the sins of humanity. If we truly believe and ask him to forgive us, then Jesus will remove our sins and cover us with his grace. If we do this, then we can have eternal life in heaven with God. (And if we don't, we go to hell and suffer in anguish apart from God for eternity.)

So, anyway, Alamo basically follows this regular route, except for one difference in what I have found to be the orthodox Evangelical understanding. Alamo claims that if one accepts Jesus and is saved, then Jesus will transform the heart of the person, and he or she will never sin again. This sinlessness is an act of faithfulness and a show of gratitude for the gift of salvation.

I found the article to be convoluted and all but incomprehensible, though. Alamo pulls from diverse parts of the Bible and sews them together in a way that stories are stripped of their richness and made ugly as parts of an absolute, literal understanding that is zany at best. Things that could be literal are inverted into symbolic, and symbolic elements are made concrete.

For example:

Hebrews 9:1 says, "Then verily the first covenant [which is done away with] had also ordinances of divine service, and a worldly sanctuary [built by men, not the Spirit of God]. For there was a tabernacle made; the first, wherein was a candlestick [symbolic of the church of God, the Lord who is the Word, the Light of the World], and the table, and the shewbread [symbolic of Christ, the Word of God, the Bread of Life, and the whole Word of God, like a table of power, strength, and joy which we eat in the presence of our enemies. 'Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies' (Psa. 23:5) keeping me spiritually nourished and with joy during all persecutions, trials, and tribulations. It is spiritual food for those of us who believe.]; which is called the sanctuary [for our souls]" (Heb. 9:1-2).

Alamo continues for a couple more verses in this chapter in the same way. If that makes real sense to you, more power to you. I had to read through it a couple of times to understand where he was trying to go, and then I didn't really like where it went. I will say that I appreciate that Alamo seems to know his Bible verses. I don't really understand how he cobbles them together out of context, but I like that the Bible is a focus. But go back and actually read Hebrews 9. It has an argument all its own that didn't need Alamo's explanation. In fact, it is an elegant argument that stands on its own.

In the same article, Alamo writes a prayer for someone to pray if they believe what they have read about the plan of salvation. Then, there is a list of four other things to do in order to receive salvation. I won't pretend to understand what "resurrection from the satanic life of Adam unto the sinless life of Christ" means in any literal sense, but apparently it is necessary for salvation. Once one has done all five steps, he or she is saved.

Alamo's closing salutation is followed by what I consider to be the nail in his coffin on my personal spiritual quest. "Someone" has added in italics at the end of the article "Tony Alamo is probably the greatest patriot this country has ever known."

Unlikely. And irrelevant. Just like the rest of the article.

T